30 Things in 30 Weeks: who you spend time with

Wednesday, April 2, 2014

Lehmann Laughter

So Tam had this awesome idea for a little Wednesday series. It's based on these two articles about things to stop/start doing for yourself. Each week Tam is gonna host a link up and you can talk as in depth, vague, specifically, creatively as you want about each of the topics. 

This week's topic is who you spend time with. 
If you've been following along lately you know I've been struggling a lot with figuring out where I belong and who I belong with. That stems from all the changes going on in my life, like graduating college, getting married, job hunting, etc. 
Cam and I have a group we've always hung out with. My two best friends from high school married two of his family members/best friends so the six of us are our own little gang. We took our honeymoon with them, had them in our wedding party (and we in theirs') and typically spent all our free time with them. 
Lately however things have gotten a little weird. I have been dealing with a lot on top of working second shift/weekends (Mondays are my only days off-not cool) so we haven't seen much of them. 
It bothered me for a while, but it's kinda part of life. 
Lately I've been spending most of time with Cam (duh) and my family. Two of my siblings are in college and were home for their spring breaks the last few weeks. Their breaks overlapped by a weekend so it was great to have our whole family in one city at the same time. 
We live about 10 minutes from my parents/youngest sister who is still in high school. I see them probably every other day whether it's stopping by before work or picking up something after. I love living nearby because it always makes me feel like there's somebody there if I need them.
Want me to be real with you for a minute? Sometimes I'm okay with not really have friends/hanging out with people outside my family and Cam. After all, in the long run they're the ones who are there for good. They're blood after all.
Other times not having friends/hanging out with the ones I do have really bothers me. I feel left out, I get angry. And social media. HOLY COW. I see friends posting about being together, calling one another their best friends and ALL THE JEALOUSY. Lately I've come to take some of the blame. After all, I need to make an effort too right?
After the wedding I really reflected on things. What I came up with was no matter the friends, who come in and out of life, my family is what matters and they're the people who are here me me near or far.

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  1. That is something I try to remind myself often. That my family unit is the one that will be there forever from now (I am reminded regularly since friends move away often around these parts). I think life goes in seasons, sometimes there is a lot of time for friends, and sometimes there isn't. The real ones will still be there when there is time. But YES social media makes all of this so much harder. It SUCKS to see things you didn't have time for or aren't invited to. Just try to remember that you don't have to have the same relationship that other people do, and if you are happy that is what matters! :)

    1. I think I'm in an "isn't" phase. I'm just not sure if the ones who are around now are the ones I'm gonna have forever. We shall see, I suppose!

  2. I agree with the above comment - friends do come and go with the seasons (not all, but most of them) and family is that forever committment, and they're easy to fall into. Especially as you discover the new dynamic of a newlywed and if you have any single friends. Your life is going to change, it may not be much at first but you'll move into different phases of your life and that will then phase other phases (people) out and it does really suck.
    And yes on your realness - overall, I'm pretty okay with being fairly friendless but then there are times when I get so fed up with not ever "doing anything" because I can see what all my past friends are currently doing and who they're doing it with on facebook. It's frustrating and conflicting and just generally annoying.

    1. I'm pretty sure I'm in a season where most are gone, and I'm kind of okay with it. But that might change tomorrow lol. It just seems like one giant paradox.


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